I have never written a blog before. This is my first time writing a blog. I want everyone to know how I feel about myself and my life. I honestly don't know who will be reading my blogs, but I feel as if this is the only way I will be strong and confident about my self. Letting out all my fears and anger, letting out all my tears and pain. This is the only way I will overcome my depression. My name... anonymous. I am currently a student at Saint Peter's College. I live in New Jersey, in a very suburb place, called Edison. I am dealing with a-lot of problems in my life. I really don't know where to begin, but I have to start somewhere. The main reason of me being depressed might not really mean anything but it's very painful. In one hand I have my family, who I grew up with ever since I was young. I am the only  daughter of my parents and I have a younger brother. I have gotten everything a girl could ever ask for, but I most certainly was not spoiled at all. My parents love me a-lot and will never do anything to make me cry, so i thought. On the other hand, I have that one person, who is ready to give up everything for me. That one person, who will always be there for me and love me no matter what. That one person who has always been there for me, during my sad and happy times. I hurt him a-lot, cheated on him and turned into a different person after going to college. Even after all this, he accepted me for who I am. We live 8,260 miles away from each other and still can hear each others heart beat. We have been together for almost 3 years now and nothing can ever make us apart. This is my almost perfect love story. But, the reason I am depressed about is that my parents won't accept him. They want me to have an arrange marriage, which I highly am against. My mom tries so hard to separate me from him. It never works cause I can't be with a person who I haven't seen or met in my life. I can't be with someone else but my love. I am almost 19 years old. I don't want to have fights with my parents, I don't want to go through this depression, I want to come home one day just thinking that there will be no fights in the house nor will there be a day where I have to come home and cry cry cry every single night. I don't know what to choose. I don't know what to feel. I don't know what to do. I just started college and life is just very messed up. All I want to do now is wish I could run 8,260 miles just to see his face, his smile, hug him tightly, let him know how much I love him and even if the world is upside down, I will always be with him and stand by him no matter what.