Name is Durrell, and I'm a victim of abuse, bullying, family death, at a young age and find myself with anger issues a lot of times. My anger results in self injury because I refuse to cause harm to others. I have not reached that point in years because of the pain i have caused to other. Life on the other hand lately is causing me to crack and thats all i can think about... I'm about to graduate... I'm expected to win a national basketball tournament coming up, A girl that i love to death just broke bad news to me (there was another guy) and my family is becoming more distant. Though it may not seem that bad, mentally it feels and is causing me to constantly be angry and it hurts to feel that way. They say run your frustration off i was so mad I ran 16 miles straight. I tried calling a hotline and they directed me somewhere else. THe feeling is terrible and wouldn't wish this upon anyone but lately i can feel myself losing control more slowly and slowly to the point I'm afraid I will not be able to control my action. As far as how i carry myself around others I am very loving and caring and there for anyone if they need me. but to tell the ones that love me most what im going through tears me up cause i don't want them to worry let alone act different towards me. Do i need help? yes i would say so.... does time allow it... no... I'm scared and worried because this is not how I am as individual and would like to get back to enjoying my own company not fearing it. Hope this helped anyone out there.