The hardest part of life is figuring out who you are add depression to that and its one big circle of never ending happyness. What is it to be happy to find yourself. I feel like someone took me away and Ive never came back. Depression has taking me away from everything my family my friends and most of all me. I always wonder if everyone else feels how I feel I wonder is that person happy with who they are? Not me im not happy with who I am, I dont know if Ive ever been "happy" with me. Im in a relationship and dont know if im happy with him, i feel like how am i suppose to know if he makes me happy when i cant make me happy. UGHHHHH LIFE SUCKS why cant there be ANSWERS! I wish i could find the things that make me me and make me happy. I envy people that just know they just know they want to do this cause this is what makes them happy or they have people that make them happy. I do have people that i feel better around but then when there gone im gone. I feel fake like i put on a smile for a aduience and make everything better than it is. not knowing who I am makes me anxious everything makes me anxious i hate that feel. I really hate that I let this mental illness take over me and make me someone that nobody likes that makes me tired, sad and isolated I just wish it would go away. ya i have better days but I feel like until i can take control of this i will never find me!