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There is no emotion inside
There is no where for me to hide
So I'll continue to lie
While part of me is left to die.

It's been going on for as long as I can remember, at different levels though. Sometimes its bad enough that I punish myself but other times I feel nothing. It has been a long time since I made myself suffer for who I am and how I feel which I am proud of, yet I still get so empty and feel so alone. I have never told anyone how bad it really is though. Its not as though I don't trust them, I just don't trust myself. I don't feel like people should be taking responsibility for me. I don't think my issues should be looked after by anyone else.

It takes a strong person to ask for help.
Well I must be incredibly weak. But it also seems no one has ever cared enough to push me to the breaking point of admiting I need help. I feel like even though I try to hide it, it is still extreamly obvious - especially to my parents. Maybe deep down thats what I want, someone to care enough to force me into treatment instead of me always looking like the strong person.

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