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In response to: Need advice

mary gold [Member]
Thank you Hustler7588. I really have no one to talk to and that is the hardest part. I used to have many friends ,but they are living far away and we lost touch. I don't confide in family. It just saddens them and they can't do anything to help me anyway. It feels good just to write here. At least it is something. I see so many of my family getting sick and passing away and while I don't fear death itself, I fear what comes before. I worry for my children even though they are adults. I worry for my pets if anything happens to me. This started when I had a bad respiratory infection and they found an irregular heartbeat. First time I really thought I might die. Now I can't live in the present day any more. Being stuck in the house a lot does not help. I get out about once a week and sometimes to an event. Other than that, I sit around thinking too much. I know there are some things I can do and I try. I walk every day and do mild exercise. I have osteoporosis so I am limited. Try to keep my mind on stories, books, tv. Nothing takes the place of human company and feedback. I had a friend who I went places with , but she is ill now too. I see the world differently these days. It is a sad place to me. It used to be I could find a lot of good in the world . Now I focus a lot on sadness. Wounded soldiers get me into a state of hysteria. Abuse of kids and pets send me into a crying fit. I know there are good people and good things that I should think about, but I just feel this world is going downhill fast.
Thanks for letting me vent here. I think even if no one responds, it is good for me to write out feelings that are deep inside. I may try therapy. Will talk to my doctor about it next appointment in early April.
I am so sorry for those that write here who also suffer from depression. I pray you will be ok.
PermalinkPermalink 03/09/12 @ 05:58

In response to: Need advice

mary gold [Member]
Thank you, I appreciate your input. I don't believe in medication for depression. I feel it makes it worse. My son has taken meds for years and is still the same if not worse. He also wants to stay in the house all the time and fears going out at night the most. He thinks people are after him. In stores he feels what he terms unreal. It breaks my heart that no one seems to help him. He even committed himself once. These feelings are new for me and I have not come to terms with what I really have. I am closer to speaking to my doctor about going into therapy. Thank you again and I wish you the best.
PermalinkPermalink 03/08/12 @ 13:34

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