For me that worst part was, and is, doing nothing.  When I do nothing, and by nothing I mean sitting around the house and mindlessly flipping TV channels to find something to watch,  I think about how there are no jobs out there for a former social studies teacher wishing to break into the technical writing field.  Now these brief periods of self loathing are not so bad, and I am usually able to get myself out of a funk without a lot of effort.

Back when I was depressed doing nothing was terrible.   Doing nothing meant that I would ruminate about all of the stupid shit that I had done to get myself in the situation that I was in at the time.. "Why did I study history?" "Why did I go to graduate school" "Why did I think I could teach?"  Inevitably this would lead to  becoming more depressed.

I know that it is very hard to motivate yourself.  But, supine on your sofa with a remote in your hand and a bag of chips on the floor in easy reach is not a position that you want to find yourself.  It will do you no good.

You have have to find something to keep yourself busy in a stimulating way.  There were three things that kept me busy.  I read a lot,  I did a lot of researching and writing for a book, and I built a lot of models.  The model building was the best.  I love to build Tamaya military models.  They have a great amount of detail, and require countless hours of work.  They are not something that can be built in one sitting.  The best part is that although they require a lot of attention to detail, there really is not a lot thinking involved in building them with the exception of following the directions.  When I built them the world around me was virtually non-existent, and I could forget about all of my worries and my depression.

You need to find something to keep you busy, and it should be something that you enjoy.  It does not have to cost a lot.  Perhaps you like crossword puzzles--I am terrible at them, and the only time that I ever completed one as when a cycling magazine was giving away a $5,000 bike.  Whatever it is, the primary goal is to keep your mind off of your depression.

Peter