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Im just a domino

The weekend is pretty much over im trying soo hard not to cry or climb into bed and curl up from the world.Im trying to hold it together but i feel like a domino lined up in one of those cute patterens and woundering how long will it be before i push my self over the edge and become serverly depressed again... i guess its a waiting game like all things in life.I feel the mask starting to cover my face so i can hide the sadness and sorrow.But the thing i hate the most is not really know y i feel like this yes i have afew things going on but im coping ... im nt feeling agreat an ways with the stupid cold and maybe thats where the low feeling began ... i dnt know.I think i need to re think things maybe a high dose is needed or having cbt might be a good idea again as my thoughts have been starting to be nt as positive as i would like. Im getting the kitten this week and im hopeing that having him will make me feel alil less sad dnt get me wrong im nt getting a kitten as a pick me up. Ive just waited along time to get him and i was worried the lady might sell him to someone else anxiety i guess so to have him will be like a dream come true. Maybe is just cause theres alot going on at once and once i got one thing out of the way i feel calmer.i need to get my panic diary out and start writing before i lose all my engery and enthesaim to do anything. I just wish this would go away i wanna stay in remission is that wat they call it? i dnt wanna relaspe again ive come so far it would be a shame to lose it now.i dnt want to worry hubby he doesnt need this ...he has done so much for me i dnt wanna let him down. i need to take a breather otherwise my tears may drop on my computer causing it to blow up lol (sorry i just needed a laugh some hope) write laters thinking of u all xx

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