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Mood Change

So its another weekend ...so close to Christmas too...and it's actually sunk in that this festive holiday is upon me. My head was in a pretty bad place few weeks ago but having switched medication and it been increased ...I feel like my old self is appe… more »


I'm at home ...I really wanted to push myself to go to work but the panic attacks from last nite and lack of sleep have just worn me out completely...I feel torn on each way I look at this coin of depression/Anxiety between guilt for not going,feeling us… more »


It was a tough start to a week with one thing or another and to be honest I guess I shouldn't of been too surprised after the weekend blues...but I have to admit the support I have received from work colleagues, friends,family has been overwhelming...it… more »

Weekend Blues

Why do I have to fall apart on a weekend ...seriously annyonning as its the only two days I get to de stress instead of re-stress. Don't know what has gotten into me these past few weeks ...seem to be having bout of tears on and off ....I don't feel sill… more »


so it's an other day, an other blog entry. I keep getting suffocating inside type feeling ....weather any of you can relate to this I honestly don't know...maybe if I try and describe it a little more. I really dont think is a full blown panic attack or… more »

No White Flag here

Been along week and although I'm committed to solidering onwith this battle ...I am seeing my self get hit with ammo ...thoughts don't seem to quiet down they are still tugging at me and sitting on my shoulders..whispering constantly... do not want to su… more »

Refuse Point Blank!!!

It's a Sunday nite and I'm having a musical evening....letting all those emotions spill out of me in a healthy way and allowing those worries to fade into the back ground after I acknowledged them FIRST and told them whats was what.I have realised I'm f… more »

a peek at freckles life

Well currently I'm at home recovering from my operation nothing serious just an investigation type procedure....I'm glad it's over I'm in shock that I'm so chirpy but hey what you gonna do. Well normally I would be at work ..yes I'm still working and ac… more »

Three Years Foward

Hello followers,Been along while for update... for that. Life is on the up...I won't say I'm fixed but I am fighter ... I'm stronger then I ever realised...so keep the HOPE and never let it fade life is forever changing you never know what's round the… more »

oreo is home :)

Can't believe how fast time flys ...you spend ages counting the days then when the day comes it goes as faster then u wished.I've finished work on holiday now for 17days and to be honest i think i really need this break my anxiety has been playing up aga… more »

Im just a domino

The weekend is pretty much over im trying soo hard not to cry or climb into bed and curl up from the world.Im trying to hold it together but i feel like a domino lined up in one of those cute patterens and woundering how long will it be before i push my… more »

Let the count down comence!!

Another week has gone by and what can i say hmmm well i have two big things happening in my life which I have to keep confidental at present (it wont be for long and i will let you in on my two lil secrets)But for know I'll tell you some exciting knews… more »

Another leap for me :)

Wow im up early ...way to early especially on my day off lol well my sleep is shot to pieces and i'm nt gonna sleepin im gonna make myself as tired as possible.Im really pleased with myself I got my pay slip this week and i thought is this worth looking… more »

o mr sandman give me dream :)

Like the title says i want mr sandman!!! lol My sleep patteren has changed again will it ever give me a break..im starting to stuggle getting off to sleep again..so tonite with a heavy heart im gonna try one of my sedaive tablets ..using it for a couple… more »

friends Reunited :)

its a grizzy day full of rain outside but that hasnt dampened my day one bit.I have been decorating yet again this weekend the flat looks so much nicer and at least it will be done before the kitten arrives.I decided to distract myself with decorating as… more »

clean freak moi !!!!

its a another day in the life of freckles and im doing pretty darn good ....im up to date with all my paperwork so that will make my worklife alot more bearable and hopefully me less stressed and running around like a headless chicken lol.Im on a tidy mi… more »

smacked with a spade lol!!!

I know the title must sound really crazy but thats exactly what happened to me today hehe.Im a nursery nurse and i was pretending to be  asleep and the children where telling me to wake up and then before i knew  it one child gets the plastic spade and s… more »

Harmony is re stored!

So its tuesday evening and a few days or so since i last left a blog.I'm  doing okay started planning a weekly planner which if  i stick to and follow should help me and also I've added exercise times and slots so i got to try and keep to it. I  seem to… more »

i came i saw i conquered!!!

Today has been Brilliant all that worry for nothing...why do we put ourselves through it I really dnt know and change isnt always bad is it?I faced my fear today and although my stomach wasnt on my side  I carried on .. and had some lovely prasies from p… more »

small steps...

its me again god being on here is addictive it is a comfort to have as I can just bang on about my ups and downs and wounder about the paths ahead of me.I have decided to just be brave and do what i need to do for work ...i know its scary for me but  avo… more »

knickers in a twist

Sorry for anyone thinking id write ablog on my knickers lol its the meaning of it was wat i was trying to get across lol.... its the end of the weekend and im sitting here listening to good old brandon flowers ..he is calming me with his words.. as im ha… more »

opps I did it again

Well its a boring thursay and im in my pjs not working today as my ibs is bugging me again. I was going to go in but you know what sometimes you have to look after yourself and think of yourself then what others think and try not to worry.I will ring wor… more »

I can see the light...again lol

The fog in my head seem to be shifting and im starting to think clearly again yay!! I hope this continues and soon i will feeel more my self.In a better place today then i have been..work seemed really good and i was able to achieve alot today...so I am … more »

Here's Monday!

It's the  start of the week dnt know if i should smile or frown...im feeling rather numb...and i have this annyoning headache which wont  ease off i think its stress...the thought of going to work full time..as well as the anit d's which ive notice have… more »

i wanna scream....so bad!!!

My life is on hold ....its like nothing really will ever change nt BIG things anyways....cause i cant sort my self out can i so nothing can move on. Im screaming inside right now ....i want to get out of this sad depressing place and be some where  fun ,… more »

lets's try this again....

this is like my 4th attempted to try and write a blog and if this works i will shout wohooooooooooooo!!(very loudly)I really need this blog as im starting to feel down ...and im nt gonna give up or anything i just hope writing something down may pick me… more »

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