Pysos the wanderer

All i wanted was for her to talk to me...it's hard because i want to give her space, but currently going through such a dip of note. Relationships aren't easy when you're like me...they never have been and probably never will be. the thing that makes it worse is that it's long distance and my love language is touch. its so hard, because you want to tell them everything but you also don't want to upset them. sometimes i really just hate being me...i just really hope that i don't mess up this relationship. i stress about it so much,to top it off i have this lovely OCD playing off in my head about ifs :roll: Being broken before has left me with scars and now sometimes my gf has to pay for my insecurities. although i am working on it and it is getting better, it's not easy and will take some time. having trust issues and being in a long distance relationship in not a good combo. BUT! she is worth it! and for the first time i can say she is someone who is truly trying to understand what it is that we go through.

So i haven't posted anything in a very long time... so in the time I've been gone, I've been very busy with academics or well trying to be.i also have a girlfriend now whom i love very much. I must say this is by far thee most difficult relationship i have ever been in, but i will fight for us to stay together. sometimes it's so hard though...sometimes i just wish i had answers to some of my questions.

Life is a funny thing. Life is like a roller coaster. It has its ups and downs. Life goes well. Life gives you lemons. Sometimes you manage to make apple juice and then life asks you how you did that. Life. Life. This is an amazing thing that we take for granted. Life...is something we try to understand. Life...is something we try to create. STOP! LOOK! LISTEN! These are things we don't do as often as we should. Do yourself a favor...stop and smell the roses. Look at the clouds. Look at the creation all around. All the small things. All the big things. Do one thing a day that scares you. Talk to a random stranger. Eat something you've never eaten. STOP taking things too personally. You'll only get hurt. Yes I'm different. Yes I'm weird. Yes I'm crazy. These are the things that people like about me. BE! Be someone you like. Be someone you look up to. Be someone people wanna be around no matter how you feel. Be real. Be you. Because you're awesome! Let LIFE be your inspiration!

So hey I just came to say hi, and that life has been keeping me very busy with all its odds and ends. I can't really complain. I have just recently been reminded how hard life can be on a person and just life itself, as this past week two people I knew passed on. One from old age and the other suicide. I just wanted to say to all you people who are suffering from depression to such an extent that you don't want to live anymore, "Just keep pushing through and seek help". I know that sometimes when you get into that state of mind it feels like no body is there for you or likes you etc, but the truth is there is someone ^_^. Keep positive thoughts and focus on the small things in life :), for when you focus on these small things it's then when you truly see what an amazing world we live in.

So hey guys. Yeah it's been a while since I have posted anything and I do apologize for that. I have recently started my Tertiary education at a varsity and have been super busy and preoccupied with all the activities and classes. so far it has been so much fun and has kept me from going to darker thoughts, but i feel like my medication it starting to lose it's full effect,as in the sense that it's not doing it's job or I'm building a resistance against the medication. Anyway, I just wanted to say hi and that it's going quite well. P.s to all my followers it would be nice to hear from you guys every now and then so please leave a comment. ^_^