I don't know what to do, I wish there was a reason I could give for why I'm depressed but I've got nothing.  I just don't want to be here, I'm sad all the time and I can't remember the last time I was genuinely happy. I started self-harming around four years ago but it's never enough anymore, things got to much so around two years ago I tried to commit suicide but It never works. I've been trying and trying since then but I'm hopless, I can't even top myself.

Also hiding the scars is unbelievably difficult, and I have to wear lots of braclets and long sleved tops but it gets impossible in summer. My sister know but it's like an unspoken agreement we don't talk about it, I like to vent my feelings some times so I kept a journal and she'd been looking through my room for something and found it! I was so angry when she said she knew and pulled out the book. I screamed at her to get out and set fire to the book. I was a mess, and needed relife so I cut again. I want help with this but I don't want people to know, I'm ashamed and I know my family and friends would be disapointed my dad would probably say I'm looking for attention, but that's the last thing I want.

I just want it all to be over.