A Little While Later
Since my last entry, my life has gone down hill even more. I discovered that my grandpa has Cancer. My mom has become more violent, physically and verbally. I also lost some of my best friends. As life passes on you discover who your true friends are. For example in my case, at first I was afraid to tell my friends about my suicide attempts, because I was afraid that they would hate me for it. Then I came to the realization that if these people were my friends then they would not hate me, but help me through the difficult times. As it turned out I landed some amazing friends and they were and still are extremely supportive. My friends are amazing I tell them more than I tell my family, and I even feel that they are my true family. They are friends with me even though I have, cut my wrists, overdosed on drugs and had to have my stomach pumped, and many other things. Now to the difficult topic of my mom. I mean she is my mother and I love her, do not get me wrong, but sometimes I wish she was not. She had a difficult childhood, her father (my grandfather) used to beat her with his belt when she did something bad. Now let me say that she has never took off her belt and beaten me, but when she gets mad I feel like I should run for the hills. She has not been diagnosed with sever anger problems, but if I were a psychologist she would be one of my worts patents. She screams curses and throws dishes, and in some cases hits me. I would not say that I am abused because I know that many kids have it way worse then me, and I have to admit sometimes I do deserve it. Even thought I may deserve it sometimes, does not mean that she should hit me. If I could I would tell her to go to a psychologist for her anger problems, but how do you tell someone that? I guess thats all for now, I will be sure to keep you posted.