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A Bit About Me

I stand on a plateform of unsteady emotion. Switching from thoughts to thoughts mainly pertaining to depression category, thoughts of how I see myself and how I see everything else. My eyes only see whats in the dark, the ways everything is bad. I cheer up many people by proving life could be really bad. Cheering up others is so much easier than cheering up myself because they have a reason that causes their pain. My sadness is like that pebble you feel when you walk, but you can't find look for it. It ceases sometimes, but only sometimes. I want this gone as much as the next person, but the advice of "Like yourself", "Don't dwell on pain", "Think happy", "Be happy" and "Seek professional help" are all good and not helping. Maybe nothing will help and I will just be that one girl who cries. I kept a lot of this to myself to avoid being just another attention seeker, but I can't do it anymore. Holding it inside only leads to the irrational thoughts of just relieving myself of this pain I have caused myself. I almost wonder if I am able to feel better, or if I am suppose to live this way. I know I am never alone, and truthfully you are only as alone as you believe. Only as happy as you allow yourself to be. If its that easy why can't I just be happy. Why do I give advice I can't understand the steps to.

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